Thursday, August 21, 2008 5 ways to make $ingtel the richest company
1st.. have exclusive rights to distribute all the phones first.. apple, sony, motorola, HTC, nokia, samsung.. and the list goes on.. reason behind that? like all know, singapore does not allow monopoly.. and having goods delivered 1st and unlocked means that.. other company also can sell what? says to customer "dun want pay, just wait lo.."
2nd.. having exclusive rights to sell the phone, hype the phone up, and price the phone as expensive as it can be.. put the most lao ya phone with the "best" pricetag.. e.g. china brand fake iphone at $700.. and get "reporters" to name it the "iphone killer!" WOW.. customers "waa.. can kill apple leh, must be some big fuck from the future leh.."
3rd.. put in high priced plans.. and offer any phones for free.. middle priced plans required for highly priced new phones.. cheap price plans will be available for old phones.. says to customers "want cheap plan arh? of cox we got.. take lao ya phones lo.."
4th.. this requires a bit of money.. but worth it.. buy over starhub and m1.. rename them, "singhub" and "S1".. terminate all lines of their customers, and offer plans starting from $50.. cancel prepaid phone lines.. says to customer "$ingtel, Singhub and S1 all standardize this price what? where got expensive? high cost larh.. no pre-paid lines cox no1 using marh.."
5th.. price phone in a new and innovative way.. call, sms, mms = free.. (money making tool cant charge) camera = 1mp $200.. gps = $ 200.. games = $50 per app.. memory = $ 50 per gb.. screen size = $100 per inch.. LOL.. e.g 16gb iphone would cost (200x2) + (6x50) + (50x16) + (3.5x100) = $$$$.. says to customer "we have a new way to provide the best deals to customer based on the functions.. we will give discounts if yu do not need the functions, we will lock it and we charge yu a flat fee of $50 per locking.."
p.s. all this is just for laughs and not intended to discriminate or put any company under bad name.
-Yagami Light
Deathnote Written At 9:15 AM .
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